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Welcome to my virtual home. This is a little private space for me to put my thoughts and share my feelings since 2005. Due to my wide range of interests, there are perhaps too many tags. I would explain some of the less obvious tags:

"About Life" is really about how I have been pondering about life and what enlightenments and paradigm shifts I had experienced.

"About Psi" contains most topics about happiness, optimism vs pessimism,
confidence, comparison, pride and prejudice and other psychological aspects.

"About Logical Thinking" is about my own way of interpretating and explaining
certain issues, aiming to debunk (or create?) superficialness of them.

"About Ideology" is about my thoughts on big concepts like freedom, justice,
fairness in society and religion.

"About Society" is more about my observations about the society, often through interactions with different peoples.

"My Country" reveals my frustration, critics and hope
on my homeland - Malaysia.

"My Little Pieces" has more short posts though mostly are written in Mandarin.

While I do have some posts on book reviews and business, I am planning to
separate them into author-specific and content-specific blogs. Stay tuned.

Enjoy your reading!

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

IA(一)

IA的生活,从开始的早睡早起到逐渐迟睡早起,只为在总共长达三个小时多的车程里做比观察群众和胡思乱想更有意义的活动:争取睡眠。战战兢兢的Office noob在紧张的工作环境下还是找到了些许游离的空间:Milo,Cloud 9以及第二师傅:来自poly的big brother。幸运地用Matlab的Simulation 度过了Sensitivity Analysis的难关,老板说明天要弄cable,哦,算是比较轻松,今天心情就可以晴朗一点。受big brother的影响,把IA的目标锁定在A,因为这比考试更有说服力。怎样拿A?我想至少要让老板留下一点印象,每天都完成一点东西,不是太过愚蠢的问题都可以去问,并且在汇报时尝试说一些比较technical的东西,错也没关系,让他觉得这人还有点能力、见解和吸收的能耐,久而久之就算他不觉得你能干也不会觉得你愚蠢。我想这应该不算工于心计,我有蛮干的韧力,但还需要一点巧思。我可不想沦为big brother口中所说那位朋友这样,每天OT还拿了B……,白干。当然,如果碰到一位总是忙碌,睬你都没有空的sup,但就只好另找门路了。
 
      朝六出晚七回,其实还并不太难适应,反正中途肯定会不时打瞌一下……反倒是回到南大后,对于时间的快速溜走感到不适应。回到来想开开工研究一下却总是没心思,想修修英文却很快疲累,更别谈提早学习下学期的课了。随便吃个饭、聊聊天、冲个凉、上上网,偶尔跑跑步,不觉得有做了什么就这样到了这个时候。
 
      不过现在也总算可以安定下来了,以后几个月的生活大致上就是这样,若有什么意外那算是惊奇,那像还未IA前脑中充满对未知的揣测?爸妈说看我在独自在外生活了两年多也仍旧好好的感到很欣慰,但我仍感到自己有时像随风漂浮无处落根的蒲公英。开始在怀疑是否是因为少了宗教的信仰,但很快就打消了把理智情感的自主权寄托于他人的想法。看回去,已走了不少路的我依旧觉得自己像个长不大的小孩,总是在徒羡别人的长大、成熟。相较之下,自己仍旧幼稚。好朋友说看了我的文章后觉得自己在其他方面落后了很多,我说那是彼此不同生活的代价。或许只能说:我们是同一类型的人,尽管从未停下过脚步,但自信从来没有满溢过,而且总是倾向为自己挂上问号……快乐就像雨季时的阳光,偶尔出现但总是短暂。
 
      唯一能够坚持的,就是在未到终点前,持续地学习……

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