@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Welcome! 欢迎!@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Welcome to my virtual home. This is a little private space for me to put my thoughts and share my feelings since 2005. Due to my wide range of interests, there are perhaps too many tags. I would explain some of the less obvious tags:

"About Life" is really about how I have been pondering about life and what enlightenments and paradigm shifts I had experienced.

"About Psi" contains most topics about happiness, optimism vs pessimism,
confidence, comparison, pride and prejudice and other psychological aspects.

"About Logical Thinking" is about my own way of interpretating and explaining
certain issues, aiming to debunk (or create?) superficialness of them.

"About Ideology" is about my thoughts on big concepts like freedom, justice,
fairness in society and religion.

"About Society" is more about my observations about the society, often through interactions with different peoples.

"My Country" reveals my frustration, critics and hope
on my homeland - Malaysia.

"My Little Pieces" has more short posts though mostly are written in Mandarin.

While I do have some posts on book reviews and business, I am planning to
separate them into author-specific and content-specific blogs. Stay tuned.

Enjoy your reading!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

离家

原来,只不过八个小时的间隔,竟已是八百公里的距离;
无奈,又再一次踏上了离家路,又再一次尝到了离家愁;
不解,为何人越大反而越想家,为何只想呆在家陪父母;
迷惑,感性与理性再度不和谐,理智压制不了情感需求。
 
我已经迟了一个星期开学,功课已从一开始就累积,应该是开始努力的时候了,可是,看着厚厚的Notes,我压根儿就提不起劲去翻阅。从来不给压力自己的我,为何在此刻会感觉到一点点的害怕?
 
早知道就不向母亲炫耀这个A+很难拿,现在周围的A+多得是,我都不知道我究竟是进步了,还是退步了。原来,害怕失去是最难以克制的恐惧。。如果这个学期没有保持至少一个A+,那我回答他们的:嗯,读得还好……岂非不攻自破?为何,他们不给我压力,我反而给我自己压力来了?
 
这一次回家,留下了太多太多的回忆;
这一次离家,带来了很多很多的忧愁;
我,还能有几次回家?
我,难道已是只羽翼已丰的成鸟,飞翔在外一去不返?
 
“后生要去创!”这是母亲的叮嘱。
“能干的才往外跑!”这是父亲的见解。
“流水不腐!”这是我的坚持。
但,这是否只是理智的分析掩盖了情感的需求?
我,忘不了某位伯母和我说的一句话:你妈只你一个儿子啊!
 
终于懂得笑了,但却更会哭了。要么就是静态的平衡,要么就是动态的平衡,唉,为何我会打破当初静态的平衡?学业、健康、体质、知识、品德、心智、情商,还有一大堆其他能力和活动。。我不想,真的不想只把自己变成书虫,但我似乎在学习有点落后了,怎么办?唉,均衡人生,不易啊!

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