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Welcome to my virtual home. This is a little private space for me to put my thoughts and share my feelings since 2005. Due to my wide range of interests, there are perhaps too many tags. I would explain some of the less obvious tags:

"About Life" is really about how I have been pondering about life and what enlightenments and paradigm shifts I had experienced.

"About Psi" contains most topics about happiness, optimism vs pessimism,
confidence, comparison, pride and prejudice and other psychological aspects.

"About Logical Thinking" is about my own way of interpretating and explaining
certain issues, aiming to debunk (or create?) superficialness of them.

"About Ideology" is about my thoughts on big concepts like freedom, justice,
fairness in society and religion.

"About Society" is more about my observations about the society, often through interactions with different peoples.

"My Country" reveals my frustration, critics and hope
on my homeland - Malaysia.

"My Little Pieces" has more short posts though mostly are written in Mandarin.

While I do have some posts on book reviews and business, I am planning to
separate them into author-specific and content-specific blogs. Stay tuned.

Enjoy your reading!

Friday, March 10, 2006

说话

昨天是纵横社最后一次练习,算一算,这已是我在辩论活动的第七年,也是我作为结辩的第六年,是不是时候需要跳出框框了?再不跳的话就没有进步的空间了。
自我涉及辩论以来就有不少人问我:“你真的是参与辩论的吗?怎么平时不见你特别爱说话,也没有时常与人争执观点?”的确,我不是一个吱喳吵闹的人,更不是一个争强好胜的人,但这与辩论没什么关系,因为辩论讲求的是思维清晰、表达流利,我不说话不代表我不会说话。但有时心里难免也是会疑惑,我是不是真的不懂得说话呢?
于是我开始追寻以前的记忆,看看自己到底是怎样走过来的。记得小学时的我其实一点也不好静,时常取笑同学、与人争吵,替朋友乱取花名更是我那时引以为傲的能力。只是到了中二,有一次作弄同学玩得太过分了导致不愉快事情发生。于是我反省和检讨自己,并开始慢慢走向沉静,更倾向于静静聆听和观察朋友的言行。到了中三我开始参加辩论,多了一个让我施展口舌的平台,但我依然没有改变在平时慎言的习惯,一直到现在。
其实内心很清楚,我在争吵、谩骂、批驳、炫耀、贬低、取笑、冷箭、传谣、谎话、巧言、粗口、胡扯、废话上的能力绝对不逊于任何人,因为自小我就懂得。虽然长时间没有使用,但要是一旦施展起来的话,我相信我很快就会回复以前那种令人咬牙切齿的牙尖嘴利。只是,何必呢?语言可以撑起一个人,也可以毁灭一个人。不是说人言可畏嘛,说得就是这个道理。
想起了刚学驾驶时父亲给的叮嘱,要学会驾快车不难,只要狂踩油门就行了;但要学会驾慢车却很难,因为你需要细心专注。但大多数人在学会驾车后,为了显示自己会驾车通常就把车驾得超快。同样的道理,要说话不难;要懂得说话的艺术却很难;要做到言行一致更是难上加难。但大多数人为了显示自己会说话,通常都选择高谈阔论滔滔不绝。记得之前从母校来南大参观的那班学弟有不少为了吸引注意力竟然频频大谈黄色笑话时,我才惊觉原来现在大多数的青少年都是这样,不禁由衷地感叹自己居然成了绝世的老人。其实,一个真正会说话的人,是懂得在适当时候保持沉默的人。正如老子所言,大智若愚,大辩若讷。

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