生活

记忆长 记忆短

一闪掠尽十年光芒

前程长 前程短

再想未来也是无常

匆匆忙忙

我们跟着进入高压职场

茫茫盲盲

是否攀爬才叫生活理想

跌跌荡荡

缓缓低飞体会复杂情感

孤孤单单

到底有谁没在寻找方向

××××××××××××××××××

记忆深 记忆浅

一时播放太多回唱

情感深 情感浅

太浓滋味不敢品尝

不慌不忙

我们不会再为琐事慌张

慵慵懒懒

但是总有远虑令人心烦

悠悠缓缓

年龄开始难以支持疯狂

平平凡凡

珍惜美好才是生活真章

The definition of success

I guess you must have attended one of those fantastic "success" seminars, or you must have heard about one of those stories of "successful" persons, and hence for at least once, you felt very motivated and "wanted to achieve success in you life". So before you begin your journey, let me ask you a supposingly simple question: what is success? Got a fortune? Have great power? Have a superior status in society? Become famous? Achieve something extraordinary? Get an ideal lover? Have a happy family? Free from worry?

It is obvious now that each of us can define success in different terms depending on the needs, unless you want to get them all. Who do not want to have them all? But did anyone on earth ever have them all? My guess is no. In fact, no goal could be achieved without at the expense of other things. In order to gain something, you need to lose something. This is called sacrifice, or called the trade off of life. What a simple theory! If you do not believe this you may well end up in constant confusion because you hold on to too many things or needs that are contradicting among themselves. Since you can't get all great things in life, what things do you want the most? I guess this is the toughest question of life. What do you really want in your life, knowing that you can't be greedy and can only keep few important things that really matter to you?

I believe most of us will not have the same set of common answers, the common answers of extraordinary things: "financial freedom", "superficial status", "great fame" or "great power". To me, success is very subjective and personal. And hence of all quotes about success, I like this the most: Success is measured by how many struggles you have overcome and how far you have advanced in your life. I know it is very hard not to compare ourselves against others in terms of monies, power, status or other quantities (things that can be quantified) to see how "successful" we are, but the basis of comparison just doesn't exist. None of us start from the same starting point, face the same challenges, have the same struggles to overcome, and want the same things in life.

Not even the financial freedom, I shall say, should be the goal for everyone. No, I am not opposing the great motivation to achieve financial freedom in life, but I am getting more skeptical of the validity or righteousness of selling this idea. It is easier for the seller of financial freedom to achieve it than the mass audience. Can everyone achieve financial freedom? No, the world will stop functioning immediately if all of us become parasites. Can some of us achieve financial freedom? Yes, but how many percent of us? This percentage cannot be high, at least not more than fifty. In fact, the percentage is really small, and it's a tough road and often comes with ugly scenes. So why bother so much about financial freedom? Do you really need to achieve this first before you achieve other things? Do you want to sacrifice other things in life to get this?

I have been thinking very hard on this topic - success for the past few years, and only till now I have a clearer picture of things that I want to achieve in life. If there is any success I want to achieve, that success, is called BALANCE OF LIFE, the balance of aspects that I treasure the most: family, friendship, personal growth and contribution to the society (via career or other activities). This balance, of course need to be built on the foundation of stable incomes, but not financial freedom. You do not need financial freedom to achieve this balance.

挫折与希望

收拾文件时，无意中在联系表中看到了你的名字与电话。原来，你的字迹是那么的豪迈。曾经听说，字迹多少能反映出人的行为原则。这种说法，用在你身上，不无道理。豪爽的性格与朗朗的笑声，是你留给大家的印象，所以当你走时，大家都大惑不解。

而我，尽管也心存疑惑，尽管也不能接受，却自以为能隐约感受到你内心的挣扎：对理想的追求与对前景的忧虑。没有哪个刚刚踏入社会的菜鸟不会有这些挣扎，只是在你身上，这些挣扎犹如恶性的双螺旋，转呀转，转到了末路。为什么会这样子呢？或许因为你乐于助人吧。这与乐于助人怎么扯得上边呢？或许因为乐于助人的，大多并不乐于让人助吧。即使自己陷入困境，也不愿意麻烦他人，不是因为放不下面子，而是因为深觉世界早已存在过多伤痛与沉重，宁愿默默承受，也不想向外宣扬制造沉重，除非是知心的朋友。

只是，什么是伤痛呢？什么是沉重呢？这样说的话，或许对你有失公允，但是我觉得你认识到的，并不够透彻，毕竟你是在顺境下成长的，父母爱护姥姥疼惜，一生中没有经历什么大风大雨，才会误把短暂的转折视为永远的绝境。或许，我应该提早与你分享我的成长故事，让你知道我的内心曾经多么黑暗，你就不会选择走这条路了。

轻生的念头，为什么这么容易地会在你脑海中浮现呢？或许，每个人在经历重大挫折时，都曾经问过自己这个问题。我有个朋友也曾经问过自己这个问题，然后开始想歪，跑到浴室把刀子放在手腕上，凝视着镜子中的自己，犹豫了好一阵子，才把刀子放下。这不是理智不理智的问题，我觉得要自杀的人都知道自己要做什么，他们觉得自己走投无路，想不到结束挫折的方法，找不到可以依赖的人，才会想出这个“解决/解脱”的方法。

坦白说，我也经历过不少挫折，但我只会去忧心如何解决问题，而不会想到要去轻生。为什么？答案很简单。“他妈的这个世界上比我可恶比我鄙贱的人多得是，他们还不是活得好好的，甚至可能活得比我更好，为什么他们可以活，我却要去死？” 这样想，胸中登时有一股傲气激荡。

一年前，面对生活的转折与挫折，你选择了离去；而一年后，面对生活的转折与挫折，我还未找到选择，但是至少你让我知道，离去绝对不是选择。当年的经济不景气，已经开始复苏；当初冻结的工厂，即将重新营运。人生如此漫长，不可能总是厄运连连的，你说不是吗？

火

火火火火火！

烦烦烦烦烦！

怒怒怒怒怒！

烦意上脑！怒火攻心！我的问题、麻烦、烦恼、局限、困境、挣扎，就算能够让人明白，又能怎么解决？人说，当你不能改变环境，就让环境改变你，当我被环境改变了，我还是我吗？当我已不是我，我要如何有意义地生活下去？我已经丢掉很多无谓的繁琐，看破很多短暂的表象，更舍弃了很多的潜能，为什么还是不能根治问题？为什么还是不能清楚地勾画出幸福地图？为什么我的力量是如此的卑微？我孤独地成长了二十年，才有今时今日，又花了好几年的内心挣扎，避开了左一个极端，右一个极端，经过好几次的恍然大悟，才自我探索出比较健康的心态，怎么都好像无用呢？我知道啊，比上不足，比下有余，但是我真的尤其羡慕不用出色能力却依然活得轻松笑得好好的环境。环境没有问题，就不用苦思冥想去解决问题，去走自己的道路。我以为我有什么真本领，能够扭转乾坤，原来都是空想，这个世上，其实没有办法让没有“了解的同情”的人改变轻率的妄为，真的没有。至柔，无能；至刚，无能；刚柔并济，满足自我就有，实际也是无能。

知我者谓我心忧，不知我者谓我何求。但是就算有知我者，又如何？知我者不是解铃人，解铃人不是知我者。若只有我知人，而人却不知我，我又怎么去促进问题的解决？无解，无解，无解。或许，我其实不该解决掉当时突然而来的轻微精神分裂，这样子，今天我傻了，就什么都不用在乎了。

短忧歌

我有所忧，你有所忧，你我都忧，又各有所忧。忧心什么？安心何处？路有多长？梦有多短？情能多真？人能多假？忧与不忧，都仍是忧。谁能不忧？又谁能只忧？是先忧后悠，还是先悠后忧？真是人生悠悠，忧忧人生。- 记忧谈

心如止水

最近有两位在这里的好朋友不约而同地结束了单身生活，迎来了各自期待已久的甜蜜与幸福。作为看热闹的旁观者，我自然替他们高兴。周边仍然形单影只的朋友，包括我，难免会受一些影响，多少会开始漫想。

“羡慕吗？” 一点点。

“空虚吗？” 一点点。

“渴望吗？” 一点点。

“害怕吗？” 一点点。

浅浅的涟漪缓缓散开，少少的情绪渐渐蔓延。但是我稍为观察当局者的情况，短暂假设代入角色后，心里却又有点不寒而栗，倒抽一口凉气，才醒悟原来自己现在有着无价的自由。当局者清，自得其乐，与我怎么看待无关，毕竟人各有志，甜甜蜜蜜与逍遥自在之间，各有取舍。只是，在对待爱情的态度上，男女之间分别之大，始终困扰着我。

在进入爱情之后，男性的快乐在哪里？

挑战成功的自豪感？

拥有伴侣的成就感？

给予保护的满足感？

受伤被疼的幸福感？

在进入爱情之后，女性的快乐在哪里？

被人保护的安全感？

有人陪伴的亲切感？

付出关心的喜悦感？

被人疼惜的幸福感？

对于大多数男女而言，对待爱情之间的区别，大致还是存在的，我想我的尝试回答，应该表达出了不同的侧重点。在得到爱情之后，男的热诚大概要比得到之前弱，而女的则相反。在得到爱情之后，男的大概比得到之前更渴望自由，而女的则相反。为什么在进入爱情之后，把大多数时间花在对方身上，更多男的会认为这是失去自由，更多女的会认为这是得到幸福？真是奇怪兼有趣。

当然，每一个人都是特别的，所以无论我怎么回答，都是“以偏概全”；每一段爱情都是特殊的，所以无论我回答多长，都是“管中窥豹”。上述的判断，都源自我主观的观察，难免会有偏颇，但这确实是我目前的想法。或许，男人想追求的是女人，而女人想追求的是爱情吧！

男女之别，不是对错的问题，而是理解与包容的问题。只是，现在非常自由的我，逍遥自在，乐不思爱，宁可偶尔抒发短暂的空虚，也不愿束缚奔放的心灵。爱情，纵使是每艘船最终靠岸的码头；我这叶扁舟，仍想暂时留在海中央，任海风吹弄、任海水流抚、任晨曦映照、任夕阳洒辉、仍星光笑烁，无拘无束地漂流，享受最后的自由。

宿命

有的树长于肥沃之土，营养充分茁壮成长，年年花满枝；有的树长于贫瘠之土，环境恶劣苦苦存活，日夜风摇根。纵使努力能带来更多偶然幸运的机会，也丝毫减弱不了厄运的影响。虽然这些未必是宿命的安排，但范围的大小却早已被环境所限定，能改变的仅有那么多。或许生活有序仅是茫茫无序中的无心插柳，但这稀奇的无心，其实无比地珍贵。就算能改变的很少，怎么也比苍白无力的宿命安排好。星火，就算未必燎原，至少也曾经灿烂，不是吗？

奇人

人世间，本来奇人就很多；在辽阔无际的互联网上，奇人就更多了，遇到奇人的机会也更多。

话说有这样一个人，在面谱（Facebook）上通过悦读书房加我为友，于是好奇的我便去看看他的背景与过往的讯息更新，看到当中有不少关于中华文化的介绍与推荐，看来是同道中人，于是就发了封电邮与他联系，不过没两个回合，交流就打住了。我觉得他有点奇怪，虽然敬佩他“为往圣继绝学”的壮志，但是在他高举复兴中华文化的旗帜背后，我隐隐察觉到他有先入为主乱抛书包的倾向。诉诸于情绪的文章，往往让我的理性有点躁动不安。

自此之后，我就没什么注意他的更新，直到最近他发了篇关于“李约瑟”的短文，我的眼睛瞄了瞄，扫到第二个句子时眉毛登时皱了起来。“著名科学家，两次诺贝尔奖得主李约瑟博士……”李约瑟博士几时拿过诺贝尔奖呢？我大惑不解，立刻去诺贝尔官方网站检查得奖者名单，确认了李约瑟博士不是诺贝尔奖得主。我的怀疑果然没有错。

避免他继续混淆视听，我开始了质疑，礼貌地在面谱上询问他这个问题，结果他回以长长的一段符号来晓之大义无的放矢。既然他逃避，我就直接替他总结出答案，请他实事求是尊重事实。结果呢？结果他居然直接把整篇短文给删掉了！真让我惊讶的张开了口。然后呢？然后他把短文再重新发表，自然这一次少了关于“诺贝尔奖得主”的部分。真让我惊讶的关不了口。

长篇大论必有疏漏，得人指出错误，应当是求之不得，但是他不到最后一刻也不肯放弃扭曲事实，并且故意隐瞒曾经出错，实在令我迷惑。这个人，不简单，真的不简单，而且奇得很。容易让人轻信而后深信的，不会是荒诞不经的谬论，而是真假参半的迷论。我想他已经有半只脚踏入自己主观世界营造出来的虚幻世界，另外半只脚，悬在现实的半空中捕风捉影。我在之前的文章写过，完美的谎话最容易编，越是大义凛然的道理，越有可能是虚假的，纯粹是作者天马行空的意淫。

你绝对可以认为我主观的推测有偏颇，但是对于故意隐瞒与扭曲事实来弘扬大道理的做法，我深以为恶。这绝对不是善心误做恶事，误披狼皮的羊，而更可能是别有居心与目的，披着羊皮的狼。要知道，单单复兴中华文化这一句子，就已经是多大的道义！能够带来多大的名声！如果他不重名声，又怎么会故意删除错误，而不是大方承认呢？包装。只是，以孔孟之道来作包装，让人痛心。

我喜欢中华文化，但我不会全盘接受它。我喜欢的，是它的精华；我警惕的，是它的糟粕。更重要的是，我不止喜欢中华文化的精华，我也喜欢其他文化的精华，更喜欢现代文明的精华，譬如法治精神与基本人权等。我相信，精华者，有普世的真善美元素，也必为世人所喜爱。五千年的历史与文化，并非不值一谈，但是谈谈就好，何必引以为傲？何必选择性失聪？是不是粉饰了祖先的丰功伟绩，我们能活得更昂扬？虚名。

最会骗人的人，不是别人，而是自己。切莫为了弘扬道理，而牺牲真实。这样做，不但无功于弘扬道理，反而是对道理最为讽刺的亵渎。出卖了理性，就是出卖了灵魂。以欺骗自己与出卖灵魂的代价来换取名声，值得吗？或许因为我不是奇人，所以我不觉得值得吧。

物 - 欲 - 人

有些东西，不是单凭说说就能证明什么，而是必须在它们来到时以正确行动回应，才能宣告度过考验，譬如说名利权。

不是说这三件奇物一定不好，纵观历史，也的确有人能够正确利用它们发挥出奇效；只是对于大多数的一般人而言，这些奇物犹如潘多拉的盒子，一旦打开了，就连带把自己本来尚能控制的魔鬼，也一并释放出来，呼乱风唤暴雨，肆意作乱。你难道没有看到，许多中了彩票的横财暴富起来的一般人，呼风唤雨过后居然陷入贫困潦倒，生活状况不但不如运气来到之前，精神状况反而多了无尽唏嘘、遗憾、后悔、哀伤、自责与痛苦？不过是一般人，当然不知道如何利用了。

那前无来者的体坛猛虎伍兹呢？是不是一般人？那享誉无数的顶级导演梁智强呢？是不是一般人？他们有过人才华、有辉煌事业、有雄厚财富、有赫赫名声、有家庭子女，几乎人生圆满的所有元素都有了，应该不是一般人了吧？但是他们也一样驾驭不住心魔，在一片责骂与窃笑中，倒下了。从这个角度看，原来他们也不过很一般。我仔细看了伍兹向大众致歉的报导，才明白为什么他倒下了。因为他从来没有想过自己会倒下，所以他倒下了。上得山多终遇虎？他自己就是老虎了，还怕谁呢？至于梁导演，恐怕也是这样想的。他们都以为包揽了名利权，就可以为所欲为而无所顾忌，结果伤害的，反而是身旁最亲的、最无辜的。

你为他们觉得可惜吗？我一点也不觉得可惜。不是因为我嫉妒他们或憎恨他们，也想落井下石一番。如果不是因为事情被揭发，魔鬼会甘心重回潘多拉的盒子里吗？前一段的故事是福兮祸之所伏，身在福中不知福却肆意妄为，种下祸的种子；接下来的故事就是祸兮福之所倚，羞辱让他们醒悟自己的过失，苦海无边回头是岸，过而痛改，种下福的种子。只是被殃及的池鱼，享了什么福，往后又会有什么样的福呢？我真的不知道。

其实，娱乐圈本来就是是非之地，时时都有劲爆新闻；而各处高峰，也大多被脏雪覆盖，远看洁白而已。只是新闻爆来爆去，为什么仍未见有警惕之效呢？为什么都抱着侥幸的心态，而不从别人的错误学习呢？世人，在这些考验之下，难道真的如此不堪一击吗？名利权者，可载舟亦可覆舟，道理非常浅显，但真正明白的，又有几个人呢？明白了，就能独善其身，亦或兼善天下。

能独善其身的，清楚了解自己缺乏能力驾驭这些奇物，所以甘于平凡；能兼善天下的，清楚了解自己需要这些奇物来让世界更美好，所以能随时警惕自己。人们常说，男人只是为两样东西所烦，不是“烦事业（金钱）”就是“烦女人”。听起来好像没有什么，但仔细想一想，只为这两样东西而烦的男人，一旦有事业有家庭过后，还会有什么追求？还会玩什么？

其实，人生一世，匆匆忙忙只为追求事业和女人，匆匆茫茫只为追求昙花一现的名利权，是否欠缺一些最根本的东西？我们都在赶路，可是，什么东西在赶我们呢？

破虚归真

让自己跟随时间流动，不让时间平白流失，有空余就学习；不妄自追赶时间，疲倦了就休息；不沉溺于缅怀已逝的过去，记忆无需被读取时就不启动；不过分担忧将来的流向，让安排好了的事情顺着时间来到，让意外发生而不惊怕。人若鱼，时间若水，人过时间，恍若鱼在水中闲游，那么怡然自得。诚然，水不能为外物所污浊，时间不能为外人所主宰，否则如鱼于水之说只是空谈、只是妄想。

随着对人生的思考越来越深入与重新学习的知识越来越多，看破的虚幻之念越来越多，也就更加珍惜剩余下来的东西：珍惜时间、珍惜学习与成长、珍惜思想、珍惜亲人与朋友、珍惜美好。我现在的想法很直接，不知道要如何消磨时间的人，跟害怕与时间独处的人，大抵都还没开始思考人生的意义与方向，更别说掌握人生了。

那我看破的虚幻之念有什么呢？有很多，但主要是那些表面的风光、短暂的利害与混沌的争权。譬如说我曾经敬畏的，大型企业的大腕与高级主管们，原来不是大多数的都具有远见卓识。譬如说那个我曾经有所幻想但幻想不大的国际华语辩论大舞台，前两年我就在某一届中国冠军队某个队员的博客中，看到当中某些所谓名教练私底下某些不知所谓的行为。譬如说当初学长曾经推荐必读的，提出“文明冲突论”的亨廷顿，前几天我就在作家木令耆的《读书拾遗》中，看到关于一般哈佛学界视他为“学术界的恐龙”（恐龙，大而不当，不能适应现实社会）的描述。譬如说经常被长辈视之为真实可靠的，也是我小时候主要的精神粮食 - 报章，近年来在商业和政治的狂风暴雨侵袭下变得如此残破欲坠。譬如说我小时候读到的，不少伟大科学家之“完美”人格，自我从科学史得知他们的不少阴险伎俩之后变得如此苍白。譬如说我曾经敬重过的，写出优美文章的著名作家们，原来不是所有的他们都是文如其人，知与行其实可以切割开来，像患有性格分裂症的精神病患者般活着。譬如说我最喜欢的中华文明与文化，每过一阵子总会有缘碰到一些把它们抬上神殿来膜拜的“狂热之士”，口口声声以捍卫传统的卫道士自居，而拒绝与提出质疑的人来个理性争辩，而胡乱地旁征博引，或直接嗤之以鼻。这些人，往往得其糟粕之形，却失其精华之神。总之，羊头狗肉之多，不一而论。

看破的越来越多，难免会倾向于避世或出世，但我尝试以好奇的眼睛和好玩的心态去持续调整。毕竟，我不是在独行。不屑以正派人士自居的人们（因为他们知道自己也随时可能犯错，所以始终克克兢兢，一如波普提出的科学论般，科学之所以为科学，正是在于它可以被反证与推翻，而不像一些伪学说，不能被证实也不能被证伪。），也有独特的面具来行走人间，也有独特的气味供互相辨认，也有独特的管道来互相沟通，也有独特的语言互为共鸣。

当我的心境再平和一些，就是阅读庄子之时。

路弯弯

远路弯弯

流光慢慢

回头难认来时转

再走不知共几伴

人生有谁不知难

再难只许轻轻叹

前方确是漫漫

励志也能心安

语言表达之我见

用语言来表达关系，绝对不比数理逻辑清楚；但是用数理逻辑来表达概念，比用语言烦冗费时得多，所以更难彰显张力。

先谈全称命题和特称命题。全称命题就是所有对象都能满足条件，比如说所有动物都会吃、喝和睡；而特称命题就是只有一部分的对象能满足条件，比如说有些动物会跑，如果要更准确些，可以会继续包括那些动物能跑，而或者如果命题是不确定的，就用概率。

但是用语文表达，除非作者思维很清晰特地去注明，否则通常不会故意指出是特称或全称关系，而让读者去用“常识”或“常理”去明白。这一点，尤其在名言或精句上可以找到，因为名言或精句必须要精简才能让人如饮醍醐，太罗嗦很容易让人兴趣索然。所以名句和精句是非常有针对性的指出一些道理或道理的一部分，不代表道理的全部，也不打算彰显完整的道理（若是的话，就是学术著作了），所以千万不能视之为放诸四海皆准的真理。

譬如说，有一本很出名的书，叫做“细节决定成败”，里面讲述了许多可以决定成败的细节，所以倡导大家应该注意细节。但是仔细想一想，是否所有的细节都可以决定成败呢？引擎的某个小零件坏了，可以导致大爆炸；控制汽车的电子系统程序，一旦程序出错，可以导致意外（指最近丰田汽车意外加速导致不少车祸，需要在全球召回问题车辆的大事），这些细节都可以决定成败。但是有些细节无论是对是错，都是无关痛痒的鸡毛蒜皮，忽略它反而是明智的，譬如说丰田曾经因为停止在车底的喷漆而省下不少成本。如何理解“细节决定成败”这一句，成为关键。看了书的标题后，如果你理解成所有的细节都决定成败，你会凡事都力求做到尽善尽美；如果你理解成大多数的细节能决定成败，你会抓大放小做事更有效率（自然你可以说，这样做也是决定成败，但是这个概念已变成“如何正确处理细节决定成败”。）

就正如用语文表达，我不可能把每一字的内涵与外延都表达得准确无误，这样写文章就成了写律法，字字珠玑是以最少的字句展现最多的内容，简洁美丽却还能大致通情达理。语文表达的准确度与张力，此消彼长，好像鱼与熊掌般不能兼得，也好像量子力学中电子的位置与速度的不确定性。好像扯远了，哈哈。

各打五十大板

在争辩当中，有一种总结我很讨厌，就是无论是非黑白，一概两边各打五十大板，仿佛世上的道理都是灰的，和稀泥地平息两方，不争辩才是好的。

世上不是没有模糊不清的争论，但是单凡争辩就用这招来混，实在是反智，就好象争论一个人是男是女时，你总不能说“好啦好啦，你们各自都有道理”，什么道理？不男不女？（现实中这个是可能的）又好比争论一个人有没有犯罪杀人时，你总不能说“他可能有做，可能没有做”的谬论，对不？这两个都是极端的例子，但道理是一样的。

只要大板一打下来，什么道理都不用讲了，连错误都可以放过了，连谬论都可以扫进地毯下了，这样子争辩来干什么？不要老是说，你这样说有道理，那样说也有道理，道理在哪里？必须说清楚。什么情况下可以作准？什么情况下不可以？如果可以说清楚，那才可以令人信服，不然的话，就只是乱棍一扫通通打翻，什么建设性都没有。

手持这种大板或乱棍的，有许多是自诩为自由主义的人士，好象是唯有变化多端才能算美，孰不知真理就算不能被精准地确立，也不能等同于谬论，就正如自由也不是绝对自由，而是被限定出来的，有个范畴。在这个资讯爆炸的年代，很多人很容易因为不能承受大量讯息的冲击，而倾向于以这样子糟蹋争论，名为自由主义，实为虚无主义，和古代懒得处理案件只会判处两边各打五十大板的昏官，有什么分别？

人与言谈

这个世界好玩的地方就在于，没有邪派的会自认是邪派而陷自己于绝境。这个道理，小学老师就说了，而且说得更清楚，“有小偷会认自己偷东西的吗？”。但是人的善恶不是固定不变的，所以想来想去，就只有这句话派得上用场了 - “不以言举人， 不以人废言”。

所谓不以言举人，就是不要因为一个人善于言谈就推举他。堂而皇之的大道理，有谁不会讲呢？深入浅出的哲理，比较少人能讲，但一个人即使能讲得很清楚，是否能代表他言行一致呢？关键的，是言论显示出来的道理，而不是说道理的人。注重前者，才能吸收精神养分，提升自己的见识与涵养；注重后者，就会逐渐依附于表象，进而生出敬畏和崇拜，反而不利于独立思考。

这个道理容易明白，但是实践起来并不容易。一般朋友之间的是是非非就不说了，古今中外多少伟人的知识，有多少是我们还未接触，就先被威名所震慑而觉得一定全有道理了？不是有这么一句么？伟人之所以伟大，是因为人们跪着看他。

至于不以人废言，则是不要因为一个人的品行不好就全盘否定他的言论。这不但表现出宽大的胸襟，更展示出成熟的理性，只是却更难实践。就好比我们明明知道人不可貌相，却时常抱着第一印象的成见，而忽略去持续观察与注意变化。就算是愚人，千虑也必有一得，以人废言等于闭关自守，对于提升思维又有何用？

虽然我不是佛教徒，但是我觉得羯腊摩经（Kalama Sutra) 的十项准则说得更清楚：

一、不因为他人的口传、传说，就信以为真。
二、不因为奉行传统，就信以为真。
三、不因为是正在流传的消息，就信以为真。
四、不因为是宗教经典书本，就信以为真。
五、不因为根据逻辑，就信以为真。
六、不因为根据哲理，就信以为真。
七、不因为符合常识外在推理，就信以为真。
八、不因为符合自己的预测、见解、观念，就信以为真。
九、不因为演说者的威信，就信以为真。
十、不因为他是导师、大师，就信以为真。

总得来说，就是不要轻信。但是如果什么都可以怀疑，要相信什么呢？相信真、善、美。如果建立相信呢？博学慎思。但针对以上的十项准则，我想加些补充。关于第五项的“逻辑”，诚然逻辑上对的，内容不一定对；但是逻辑上不对的，内容一定有问题。逻辑不能证实内容的真伪，但是却能抓住辩证的漏洞和矛盾，所以学习形式逻辑的知识如同一律、矛盾律、排中律、全称特称、必然条件和充分条件，能帮助厘清思维。

无论怎么说都好，只要懒得动脑筋，而想抄捷径去寻找依赖，就只会离真善美越来越远。我们不得不通过表象来看本质，但是表象与本质的关系，不是那么容易厘清的，更不是永远不变的。

一场意外的相遇

一如往常，我斜着身子把肘子顶在书架上，在书局有限的营业时间内，拿着书快速翻页阅读。正当我沉浸于与书中人物交流之际，有人轻轻拍了我的肩膀一下，把我拉回去现实世界的交流当中。

我转过头，看到一幅熟悉但又很久没有看见的样貌。“嘟嘟车！”，一句熟悉但又很久没有听见的称呼，就这样自然地溜出他的口。我们的神色都微微显露出一点点的不可思议，没有想到会这样不期而遇，没有想到会相遇。于是我们交谈起来，慢慢地倾起我的近况，直至他的妻子从另一边走来，给了我一封红包，开始与我闲聊。和她闲聊当中，我偶尔转过头，也向他说明。转了一两次，不经意间，我就发觉他的眼角逐渐有一丝丝的反光。

几轮谈话之后，他们离开了书局，而我也把书本提回上来继续翻阅，只是心里想着的，却是刚刚不久的偶遇与很久以前的回忆。他那滴浅微的泪珠，其实早已掉进我的心海，引起无限涟漪，一纹一纹地由近至远，变化不停。在这世上，只有他会这样叫我，也只有我会这样应他；往年的习惯，犹如尘封的酒罐，开出来气味仍在。在此之前，我忘了有多久没见到他，不知是两年、三年还是五年；更忘了有多久没听到那句称呼，不知是五年、十年还是十五年。所谓“嘟嘟车”，其实是因为我小时候喜欢经常“鼓起两颊嘟长个嘴”，所以他才这样称呼我。真是份外亲切的称呼，份外亲切的关系。只可惜，时过境迁，人依旧是，物却已非。彼此相对的环境，变得不似模样。

无奈我出世得晚，不能对局势有什么正面的影响，改变其经过的偏歪轨道。那份源自至良至善之心的亲切，一直让我感动至深，也让现在的我更加明白和坚信，每个人都有独特的天性，一定要好好把握住，逐渐增强善加利用，才能发挥该有的作用、带来正确的影响、和实现自身的意义。有的人活力四射，但缺乏规划；有的人观察至深，但倾向避世；有的人善于谋略，但不重道义；有的人至良至善，但不善辨别。如何完善自己的人格，实在是毕生的功课。

但愿，当我们再次相遇，那环境会再起变化。这样，彼此的那份亲切，才不会平添无谓的苍凉。当然，心中恳切地希望，在彼此的路上，我们各自都走好。

看透

古诗有句“做惯乞儿懒做官”，稍微改成“做惯闲人懒做工”，挺适合形容我现在的心情。自由自在的生活，没有排山倒海的职责，没有无理取闹的压迫，我越来越喜欢。把握充裕的时间来充实尚年轻的自己，没有比这更快乐的事。

对于企业世界的各种纷争，争职位、争权力、争升职、争上位，我越看越心寒，越听越意阑。一个公司的运作，如果大多有关这些无谓的“内部运动”，根本就是浪费人才。不能让人尽其能的公司，会逐渐被淘汰。一个老板，如果不能给予员工基本的尊重，只会各种剥削的小伎俩，根本就是无良商人。没有诚信的商人，根本做不长。

其实暂时存在的不一定合理，不能因为眼前的都是乌烟瘴气就认邪为正。举例，一个逝世的大富豪留给儿子三代都花不完的财富，但这个儿子天生败家，酒色财气全沾，大肆挥霍了十年，家产却仍未败完。于是人们啧啧称奇，挥霍这么久，怎么还没用光？然后他持续挥毫，到临死之前才把家产败光。于是不懂内情的人开始议论纷纷，原来大肆挥霍也可以善终，开始被迷惑。

在这个竞争激烈的社会里，我们不能被迷惑，哪怕是面对再强大的权力。能引起人性共鸣的，才是好策略，好管理。这道理，非常浅明，没有什么好迷惑的。索罗斯说：“组织这东西，一旦历史久了，就容易重视组织稳定和利益，更甚于原先的使命。” 大前研一说：“大企业一直找不到优秀人才，不是因为没有优秀人才进来，而是优秀人才进来后变笨了。”

尽管我未必会再涉及其中，但我就不相信混饭吃的，能混出什么名堂。只是我越看越透，更宁愿把一切当故事看，毕竟浮名利禄只是过眼云烟，人生有许多美好的事，更值得我去追寻。

附古诗：

游子闲来有事忙，

清早起床卧看山。

毕竟百年皆是梦，

做惯乞儿懒做官。

改变阅读方式

今年起会改变读书方式，先大致扫读一遍，再仔细拣出精美的句子与新颖的想法，以查阅、吸收、注解与分析，接下来按自己的理解去重整与归纳，最后写成纲要和赏析。而非简单地翻阅。

虽然这样阅读比较缓慢，但却有四大好处：

（一）去芜存菁，而非好坏通取。

（二）融会贯通，而非囫囵吞枣。

（三）加深记忆，方便温故知新。

（四）增强辨析，日后自成一家。

慢慢地，当你读越多书，思维越清晰，就能更迅速地取其精华去其糟粕，阅读速度也会随着提升。更重要的是，记忆会衰退，兴趣会转移，只有留下纲要赏析，日后才能轻而易举地恢复理解，而不用再浪费精神去重新理解。

整个过程，最关键的是不断运用和锻炼自己的脑筋。书写，最能提升思维；所以，写纲要赏析，恍如和作者越空对话，能交流与激荡思维。在浩瀚书海中游动，在万里书宇中腾空，谁说书生无用？读死书才是书虫，读活书犹如书龙。

夜谈倾心之总结

晚风习习，促膝长谈，论事议理，人生几何。周六和伟华通宵聊天，交流了不少想法。最近我在读孙子兵法，于兵理事理有更深一层的领会；再加上现时沉浸于两极相生相克的道理，所以许多新奇但兼容的想法交替涌现。

当晚的交谈总结如下：外术与内道孰轻孰重，凝固与变化孰易孰难，欲望与静念孰虚孰实，表象与本质孰假孰真，全因个人学习多寡和志向长短而变化，进而影响析事的范围大小、领悟的速度快慢和悟理的层次高低。然而一切尽在两极变化当中，掌握事物根本，明白万象之圆，才能形成自称一格的学 - 思 - 行 - 教，相通相变。

尤其喜欢学 - 思 - 行 - 教这个循环。学与思的关系，孔子以“学而不思则罔，思而不学则殆”阐明清楚，而知与行之间的互动，更是千古命题，知易行难还是知难行易，先知后行还是先行后知，没有常势，但有知就必须笃行，知而不行宛若不知。至于行与教的关系，大概没有人能否定，以身作则不证自明就是最佳的教育；然后有教就有学，有学才有教，周而复始循环不息。学与思是内心的修行，行与教是对社会的作用，因而一个人要是做好这四门功课，人生自然美满。

善学为始

每一本好书都是作者的心血，集结了作者的思维结晶，反映着作者的传授用意。作者通过细细琢磨背景、主题、结构、表达和用字力使与读者产生共鸣，因而才有“读大师的书，宛如和大师对话”之说。但读一本书，能从书中领略多少，绝对因人而异。一句智言，不同的人听来，会有不同领会；共鸣有不同振幅，领会有不同层次，这是我大学二年期间醒悟到的。

阅读，究竟帮了你多少？而你，对阅读又有什么心得？最近我想到用简单的数学（假设）来说明为何阅读非常重要。

- 作者著书，酝酿心思数年，耗时一年（自己功力200%，能传于书100%。）

- 读者读书，耗时一星期（初阅领略30%；重组分析 + 20%），持续领悟数月（他山之石综合学习 + 20%，经历上层楼温故知新+ 10%。）

撇开酝酿思维的时间，一个人，如果通过著书立说能够获得200%功力，需要一年；如果通过阅读求进，能在一星期获得50%功力。用50%乘以52，比起写作，在同一期间，阅读能获得大于十倍的功力，而且是从大师手中获得非凡的功力，简直就是吸心大法。

当然，细究起来，这个比较或说法有很多无中生有（譬如写作能磨练思维，思维敏捷才能加强领会），但却清楚显示出他山之石的威力。

因而，不阅读而成功，可能嘛？一切，皆以善学开始。

恃强凌弱

有两种性质我最讨厌，第一是用意不良的虚伪，第二是恃强凌弱。前几天在吃午餐时，收盘Aunty在我还未吃完时想收走我的碗，幸好我及时示意。后来我们聊起天来，从她口中得知有些人会因此而破口大骂，实在没有礼貌。而在前几天的销售晚课上，主讲人提到，服务高级公寓的某些住客非常不容易，就算是集体免费宴客，他们也会抱怨，抱怨说浪费他们的宝贵时间，放弃吃高级料理就来吃这些低等菜肴。

这都是什么人呢？有财富了，有身份了，有成就了，有地位了，却失礼丧心，反而不像人了。

No one can teach me who I am

No one can teach me who i am.

No one can teach you who you are.

A lot of things can be taught,

but self discovery,

one of the few things that cannot be taught,

is the most important.

钱与人性

在庄严的诉讼庭大厅内，大家都各自留意着自己的时间。然后一个胖妇笨重地走了进来。左袋右包，金链粉鞋，全套在她臃肿的身材上，格外俗气，大概没人的眼睛愿意注视多一秒。

而偏偏我却注意地如此仔细，因为她正是我和立挺等待的人 - 我们的前任房东。她的出现确实让我有点意外，我还以为害怕见光死的她会一如往常地派遣无用的丈夫来挡箭。

没想到她今天吃了豹子胆，拿着那几张假单据誓言和我们玩到底不要紧，当协调官司请她出示身份证时，她居然一脸不屑地把自己的证件扔在桌上！当场被警告。看来她一点也不胆小，竟然可以侮辱自己抓破脸皮然后无视庄严。小市民那种外表上狂傲，但骨子里自卑的矛盾顿显无疑。

有时人性的某些卑劣让我很纳闷，尤其当这些举止与他们的财富完全不配。是财富扭曲了他们的人性嘛？自古以来，人们都清楚认识到金钱的魔力，从西谚＂金钱是万恶之源＂到俗语＂有钱能使鬼推磨＂，我们都无时无刻被提醒。

于是贪婪的人敛财万贯，而理智的人害怕聚财。可是事实真是这样嘛？富有的人一定不义嘛？富有的人一定骄奢嘛？看一看刚刚去世的新加坡首富，再看看乐善好施的南洋先贤如陈嘉庚等，美国富豪如比尔盖兹等，都在描绘截然不同的风景。即使备受争议的金融巨鳄索罗斯，也设立不少开放社会基金；更别说那些成功的中小型企业创业家，当中不少都处事低调，极少炫耀财富。如我念过的书（关于多数美国富豪）所说，大部分的富豪并没有如媒体所渲染般凡事讲排场讲气派，而是该用则用该省则省。

稍微偏颇地说，大多数的普通人和大多数的富豪的生活都是平实的，反而大多数夹在中间的，容易因为有少少钱就开始不知天高地厚，一朝得志语无伦次。好比最可恶的，往往不是残暴的老虎，而是为虎作伥的狐狸；最无耻的，往往不是富可敌国的商贾，而是碰上好运的暴发户。

到头来，其实钱哪里有什么魔力？一切都是人的恐惧和贪婪所致。钱，是一面最清晰的镜子，反映着人性；也是一关最恐怖的考验，测试着人性。驭剑者，人也，功夫不到家就会伤到自己；驭钱者，亦人也，人性不通透就会毁掉自己。

We walk from the past

Some nights a few months ago, we were filling our stomach with BK fries after 3-hour course, and now at the same place, about the same time, with the same hungry stomach and same fries, it's just me.

It's a fact that path diverges when time flows, as each of us actually bounds to head for own direction, and to live a unique life. Hence it is unavoidable that, in different stages of life, we walk along with different friends.

I used to view this in a slightly dim colour, in tandem with a more passive mentality about life that time. But after a while I realized that I am not going to change anything no matter how much I dwell on the past. What is past, is past. What I can do, is at present. What I can affect, is future. How I view the past actually affects my present, and thus affects my future. Hence I have to change the way I see things, especially past things.

It was sad to hear recent more suicides of NTU students again, and whenever I hear about it, somehow an image of my old friend will appear in my mind. Come to think about it, it is now close to a year since that incident. Time, really flies. Looking back, the reason still remains mysterious.

I will never understand how depressed and despair a person is when he is thinking of giving up two important assets: himself and his future. Only one thing is certain, that sufferings to him at that moment are insurmountable. And hence he chooses to escape in the way that brings greater griefs to those remain.

It's very irrational indeed. But if a person can stay rational, he won't give up hope and bury himself together with the ashes of the past. What is past, is past. What can be changed, is future. Choices, are still abundant, if we open our hearts and free ourselves from the shackles of the past.

Past, becomes a shackle if we think of going back to resume or prolong the journey. We can't do it. What is past, is past. We can't delete it, we can't hide it, we can't change it, we can't do anything about it. So why bother so much, if it is not for helping us?

We only live once, and time is the essence. Walk from the past, live at the moment, and go for the future.

求真

韶光有限 能堪多少虚情假意

真情无价 犹胜万千浮名飘利

缘

曾经我以为，他乡遇故知，是缘分；曾经我以为，相知兼同喜，是缘分；曾经我以为，半信半迷间，是缘分；结果都是襄王有心，无奈了三次。爱情无对错，错不在我，错不在她，彼此心意不同，只能叹无缘。其实，一切纯属巧合（或概率游戏），我爱的人，碰上爱我的人，就是缘分。

谋事在人，成事在天，冥冥中自有天意，谁能计较得失？

多少悲欢离合，几许长长久久。

风雨独笑纯稚，海石自证真情。

以酒会友

把酒共欢，真情几何？

风吹酒散，梦醒归家。

人生漫漫，何欲何求？

路遥日久，信谊长醇。

P/S；不懂平仄，不强求押韵，毕竟这不能吟，无需符合音律，只是喜欢古文的精简，更显力度。

察其所不安

与任何人相处，首先要了解他几时会有情绪，有怎样的情绪以及如何处理情绪，才能避免冲突，待得风平浪静时再理智对话。

撇开情绪，大部分的人还是蛮容易相处的。只是如果因为在一般情况下相处融洽，就满心欢喜而忽视上述的了解，便会在不适当的时候给予不适当的反应，导致彼此的关系起起落落，有时如糖黏豆，有时如水掺油。

我记得刚读到孔子的“视其所以，观其所由，察其所安”时，很为最后那句察其所安所折服，因为平日言行是大家都可以观察得到的，背后动机是大家都可以去揣测的，但一个人安心时喜欢做什么却没什么人去留意，尽管那些行为才贴近他的本性。

而现在，我想不仅仅察其所安重要，察其所不安更重要。至于要明白别人的情绪，则先要坦诚面对自己的情绪，才能推己及人。知己，才能知彼。我极少动怒，但一旦怒起来非常倔强，因为能够惹怒我的都不是小事，而是那些和我的主要原则矛盾对立的行为。从中学到现在，我火山爆发了六次，而且六次都是不同的对象，六种我完全不能认可的行为原则。只是动怒以后，我再也不会为同样的事情爆发，因为不是别人有所改善，就是我会降低对别人的期望（或彻底失望）。我的情绪容易被别人不明所以的不恰当行为所牵引。对人有期望，才会有失望，这是我很大的弱点。

所以，一切还是得从自身的修行做起。待得修为到家，就算别人的行为千奇百怪，别人的情绪千变万化，我也只会尝试去明白、接受和帮助，就算帮不上忙，至少也不会引起情绪连锁反应，拿别人的情绪来惩罚自己，于事无补节外生枝，何乐而为之呢？

最重要的是，察人所不安，才能进退有度收放自如，游刃于众人之间。

How true can you be?

Human is neither the perfect angel nor the perfect devil.

Be true to yourself so that you can limit your damage done on others.

Be true to yourself so that you can keep planting seeds of kindness in the society.

Be true to yourself so that you can be fair to others.

享乐

看了一篇Fabregas讲述他去年某些经历的报道，其中一句特别有意思：“生活是用来享受的，因为今天你在这，明天就可能走了。”（More and more I'm realising that life is to be enjoyed. You're here today and gone tomorrow.”）用笨蛋Krix的英文来说，就是：“Live like you are dying.”；用深奥一点的词来阐明，就是“生命无常，惜福享乐”。

但享乐是什么？是享受快乐。但我们要追求怎么样的快乐呢？这一点看起来有点因人而异，但我觉得个人应该追求长久深远的快乐。享乐可以是偶尔的纵欲；但纵欲未必是享乐，沉溺于欲望之泥潭，换不来长久的快乐。享乐可以是短暂的牺牲，先苦后甜，但不是只记得牺牲。

快乐，是自找的。只是，人生真的有那么多乐子可寻吗？不如意事，十常八九啊！亲朋离去，生命夭折，疾病贫困，种种天灾人祸，叫人心情沉重，如何乐得起来呢？的确，在这些事情上，我们难以转悲为喜，但我们却可以决定几时要走出伤痛。减少痛苦的时间，不就是增加享乐的时间了吗？生命，其实不过是如此简单的数学题，但要悟出当中道理，每个人需要不同的经历和时间。在那篇报道中，Fabregas说他以前需要三四个小时才能走出失败的挫折，现在却只需要半个小时。

我们永远无法控制情绪的到来，但我们可以控制情绪的离去，无论是用疏导、抒发还是转化的方式。我们或许不会明白各种情绪的来源和形成，毕竟有许多是进化残留下来的，但人最可贵的地方就是理性思维，只要我们善于思考，就能顺利地化情绪为力量。

人生匆匆，光阴无价，为什么不让自己有多一点快乐的时光，开开心心地走下去呢？

P/S：俗世多愚，智慧无价，有感悟性尚低，难以参透古典奥义，唯有从可信赖的智慧大师学习，当下潜心研究大前研一和教授温格的言行。

新年第二周的静思

这个星期，感觉就是有点不顺。一来身体微恙，二来钱包出血，三来奋斗路上孤独艰辛，知音不多。或许我比较怪吧，没有事时我会比较张扬，有事时我会选择沉静。我的意志并不消沉，却总觉得还少了一两个并肩作战的战友。很多事情，一旦我没有跟进，就会停住。长此下去，不是办法。或许我需要扩大社交圈子，认识更多人，才能找到更多志同道合的英雄，互相扶持共同前进吧。

路弯弯

知道的太多，尤其是知道一些不想知道的事情，其实感觉不太好；看得越清楚，越能看到不想看到的事情，其实心会不舒服。但，这就是人生吧。虚幻的面纱，总会被揭开；乱真的泡沫，总会被刺破。每一段路，有每一段的精彩和失落。前路即将转弯时，无论精彩多么难舍，失落多么真切，转了弯后回头望，其实人事早已全非。回望，徒添无谓的感伤。

宁可别人伤我，不可自己伤人。不计较，才是最大的幸福。

漏防纵恶

夜来忧烦，独自去跑步。
踏步迎风，呼吸心静处。
遥望星云，思绪尽托付。
宇宙万物，惟人世繁复。

我从来就不相信人是绝对的恶，而是可以不断改善的，所以谨记着“恕”；但我也不相信人是绝对的善，只要有作恶的空间或恶欲的诱惑，人就会犯错，所以谨记着“防”。（这是很可悲的，但却是事实，否则社会也不需要法制了。）可惜我这一次漏了。

一对母女由中介领着来看房子，顽皮的幼童趁所有大人不注意时，伸手推破了房东最心爱也是最贵的吉祥物-玉制比丘。我顿时有点慌了，致电房东询问价钱，然后和她们索取赔偿。由于那个中介和我同公司，心想她应该懂得如何处理，而且我也肯定可以通过公司找到她，所以就“放”了她们走。

没想到隔天联系那个中介时，她说她的买家一直没有回电，而她没有其他联系方式。那一刻我的心顿时凉了。完了，我亏大了。果然，在过后的几天里，一切石沉大海。没法子，只好自掏腰包补偿房东，尽管我没有让他知道真相。

当然，我可以告诉他买家玩臭逃债，让他蒙受损失，但一来他们信任我把房子交给我卖，二来东西被摔破了后他们没有给我臭脸看，我实在不愿意让他们白白损失，从而影响他们对我的信任和以后的合作关系。

所以，于己于人，我实在没有选择，怪就怪在自己错误估计买家和那个中介的关系，给了买家逃避责任的空间。但当我把厚厚的纸钞从钱包里抽出来时，我的心也在抽搐，无端端穷了几百块。从来没想过原来卖房子可以以这种方式来亏钱的，当真买了个教训。

当自己面临不公时，没有人会少喊不公；但当自己有机会为私利而逃避责任时，有多少人会勇敢承担？当自己有机会利用不公中饱私囊时，有多少人会抵御诱惑？恐怕没几个人。所以我从来不会在别人叫喊不公时觉得他们有多高尚，因为那些行为不过是条件反射。

小孩贪玩，少不懂事；大人“懂事”，迂回蛇行。在我看来，那个女孩摔破比丘不是什么大错，反而那个母亲在众人面前怒责她，转身之后却逃之夭夭，犯下了非常大的罪恶。第一项罪：虚伪。第二项罪：损坏他人物品却逃避赔偿。第三项罪：给孩子一个非常不好的逃罪示范，以后恐怕影响了她一生的正直。长远来看，第三项罪才是对社会带来最坏影响的。

我不知道，但我希望她不要在痛责女孩保存自己面子过后还洋洋得意地和女儿说自己如何“化险为夷”。如果那女儿天性乖巧以后叫她如何抬得起头做人？如果那女儿天性稍差叫她如何不入歧途？

大多数人害怕承担责任，只想做戏了事，却没想到其实危机就是机会。若你肯仔细想一想，这个其实是教育孩子的黄金机会。如果那个母亲能够勇敢地替女儿谢罪并且立即赔偿，再回家教导女儿为人之道：“人谁无过，过而能改，善莫大焉”，难道不是美事？可惜啊可惜。某些父母总是不明白以身作则才是教导，否则就是虚伪。

也可惜我因疏漏而纵容了这次恶，而只好以自亏来亡羊补牢，避免增加社会中彼此的不信任，希望算是小善吧。一念之差，就少了两个月的伙食费啊，唉。

善养浩然正气，问心少愧，足矣。

感伤毕。但愿祸福相倚。但愿明天会更好。

My jigsaw. My Life.

When I was young, I liked putting jigsaw puzzles back together, spending few days sitting on the ground puzzling about puzzles. I dare not say I was expert in it but I simply enjoyed the feeling of "putting the pieces together" to form back the magnificent scenery and beautiful landscape. After finishing it, I would glue it on a manila board and pass to my mother to frame it and hang on the wall.

I remember I once finished a 2000-piece puzzle with such a magnificent picture: A little wood house with layers of bright and yellowish flowers smiling to welcome the arrival of summer, with the background of snowy mountains where ices were starting to melt. Actually, it wasn't really a "finished" article. After long hours of "puzzling", there was one piece of snow jigsaw missing. So unfortunate. I had been finding it for days, searching every corner in the room and just couldn't find that one small piece. I finally gave up.

The missing space would be very obvious if the puzzle were to be displayed on the wall, but I would be very pity if the puzzle were not to be displayed after spending enormous efforts. Hence I filled in the space by creating a jigsaw piece from hard manila card, cutting it into the shape that can fit and painting it with water colours. Of course it wasn't a magnificent piece but from distance one could hardly tell the difference.

The story didn't end there. Few years later, in the midst of relocating fittings in my room and rearranging my stuffs, I have spotted a piece of puzzle on the ground. I took it, looked at the wall picture and realized:"a-ha, it's you!". After few years of silence, out of nowhere the missing piece reappeared. Time certainly is a magician but since the puzzle had been glued, there was no way for the piece to be put together. It has lost its function and became purely sentimental. So I kept it separately for my memory.

Those days of putting puzzles were gone, but patience and crave to classify pieces developed from it still remain. Sometimes I wonder, life is just like jigsaw puzzles, both of them are about the satisfaction of putting the pieces together. We are given so many different jigsaws and it's entirely up to us to decide how to put it together. Putting it nicely, it becomes scenery; putting it badly, it becomes disaster.

The only difference is, jigsaw puzzles' width and length are predetermined by others; but life's width and length are determined by us. There will always be missing pieces, but there will always be extra space as well. For me, I just want to collect more and more pieces and putting them together to form a larger and more beautiful picture.

Read and Learn

You are what you read,
but if you only read what you want to see,
you are still what you are,
regardless of how much do you read,
because you read but do not learn,
just like you hear but do not listen.

- Thoughts after reading so-called book reviews.

信任转移

大约两三年前，读了一本关于老千的书，里面提到算命最常用的招术是：“千、隆、问、屈”。简单来说就是通过说中你的过去赢取你的信任，从而侃侃而谈你未来的命。但仔细想一想，为什么知道你的过去就可以算出你的未来呢？没有必然关系。

但那时的我还没有“信任转移”这个概念，直到最近看书多了，慢慢发觉到，很多论证都是从强而有力的论点A开始，让你觉得头头是道，过后“顺其自然地”过渡到结论B。中间的必然联系呢？一笔带过。而作为读者的我们，很容易地因为相信论点A的确凿，而爱屋及乌地去相信结论B。

为什么信任会如此容易地被转移呢？疑惑中。

Information book and Internet

I saw this book when I walked around in Popular and I laughed. Investopedia? This has been the site I frequented most for last two months. So I flipped through the book and saw contents that I used to see online, with a obvious difference: one is priced, the other is free. Of course I cannot fault investopedia for its smart move by publishing book to capture larger market, but standing from a view point of a smart consumer, this book is just not for me. Why pay for something that I can obtain somewhere else for free? Somemore reading online is more flexible and easier to search.

This highlights another difference, albeit a more subtle one: passive reading vs active reading. By buying a book, you read whatever that are included inside, limited by space and cost. By reading online, you expose yourself to a sea of knowledge, limitless and borderless. You are free to flip to any page, free to flow to any site, free to find any information that is relevant. You can find different references to understand a concept, you can find different angles when analyzing an issue. It's all up to you. The reading experience is actually (because you may have not realized it) and definitely more fun and stimulating.

But what has been lacking in internet is the creditibility of the contents. So you need time to find trustable sites with trustable contents. Whereas for books, once published out, their contents would be circulated among public and cannot be withdrew back (domain can disappear overnight). So they have to be credible (to a certain extent). And hence book has its strength to offer knowledge since the first important criteria is credibility.

However, this kind of informational book (like encyclopedia of what, what and what, 1000 whatever things that you must have, and etc) would die out in the coming decades, because providing information is no longer book's strength. Internet with vast storage, great searchability and amazing linkaility can do a much better job with ease.

P/S: As a smart customer, I notice that NLB has a great collection of books that include even some of the recent books, and hence whenever I want to buy a book, I first check online catalogue of NLB using i-phone. And most of the time, I feel glad that I have done so, because I avoid unnecessary spending. If everyone do like me, maybe the publisher will bankrupt; but I am sure that not everyone would do like me, just as not everyone reads.

So why bother? Just choose my way. :)

Collection of past Facebook status updates

I think since having i-phone that can access internet 24-7, I had posted quite a lot of my thinking on Facebook. These flashes of thoughts are not long enough to become blog articles, but yet are important for me at the time of expressing them out. Hence I have decided to compile them here for future reference, with additional notes.

2010-01-02:

I wonder how people construct logic to rationalize things without first checking for missing links. When even science is based on hypothesis, it seems inexplicable to see why people sometime are so adamant with their superficial logics. Affection with their creation, perhaps.

[Thought developed from opinions from some football fans, suggesting tones of 'logical' answers regarding the situation, of which actually contradicts with the true answer: the missing information. However, this phenomenon can be observed everywhere. How often do we quickly believe something just because they sound logical and outline a simple causal relationship where in reality events have more than one cause?

One of the most vivid examples that I could link from my past readings is this: Since now everyone use cell phone and it has becomes a necessity, it's good to buy stocks of cell-phone companies like Nokia. Sure earnings. It sounds logical, isn't it? This opinion overlooks many major issues, for example the effect of supply and demand. Even demand is always there, if the market is oversupply due to stiff competitions, do you think most of the companies still grow and earn? In fact, a lot of mature industries have entered the market of oversupply.]

2009-11-29:

I will disrupt my healthy lifestyle for the final few days of 2009 for deep reflections in quiet midnight.

2009-11-28:

I believe that before you talk about theory of scarcity you have to realize the scarcity of time first.

[Economics build on the theory of scarcity and one example used is the scarcity of time. Though this is easily understood but how many do actually realize the importance of it?]

2009-11-28:

I wonder why I encounter economics so late...

[I wonder why Malaysia's education doesn't teach economics. It is such an interesting topic that involves everybody's life especially in the era of globalization and highly sophisticated market. The first encounter was in university's first year and I scored an A for that economics 101. But I never discover that I have a deep interest in this field until I have come out to work, start having some doubts on how the society is revolving and found clarifications in books of economics. I think now I have a better understanding of this sentence: "The economic base of production determines the superstructure of a society".]

2009-11-23:

牵动着每个人的，始终是梦想与现实的差距。逃避、反抗、忍受、创造、妥协、擦边、背叛、醒悟。。。有多少情绪随着时间发酵，又有多少抉择能耐岁月风化。

[现实和理想，永恒的挣扎。]

2009-11-23:

Partial truth is not truth. Correlation based on linking of partial truths is mere coincidence or sophisticate manipulation.

[The more I read, the more I know. And the more I know, the more different angle I could see regarding a correlation analyzed by others. When you need to sell to mass, your idea needs to be simple and powerful. However, this doesn't guarantee the truth of the correlation. Yes, what make up the correlation are facts, but by purposely neglecting the black swans, the so-called correlation is nothing more than a sophisticate manipulation. This is especially true for complex topics. Only the coverage of alternative view will complete the whole picture of arguments. ]

2009-11-18:

Three ways to get happiness: help a person, solve a problem, or make a thing happens. It is threefold if all is done in one act.

[I have never stopped wondering what sources of happiness are, and I did conclude few factors in two separate articles written during university time. But at present stage, I am more inclined to think that the three factors mentioned are the most important.]

2009-11-18:

Cooking book vs book cooking: ordinary people vs extraordinary scam

[All the while I know what a cooking book is but I have never heard of book cooking (or cook the books). It just forms such a big contrast between the conscience of ordinary people and the integrity of big fishes.]

2009-11-15:

Sometimes support brings motivation; sometimes expectation exerts pressure; only calmness can bind the forces together and yields great results. Time and again, I have been reminded that:"Life is a marathon, not a sprint." The moral behind the story of the race of the rabbit and the tortoise becomes so impelling now. Only continuity matters.

[Calmness is needed to convert emotions into energies properly. Only through that can emotional roller coasters be avoided and continuity of efforts be assured.]

2009-11-13:

The time will come.

[I was following my manager to see how he brought buyer to see house. After the whole process, the seller's side agent gave me a little tap on my shoulder and said this to me. As usual, there are millions types of people around the people. Good people are not divided by field or industry, not identifiable by looks, but scattered around and sparks a resonance when they meet. ]

2009-11-13:

When disciple of discipline meet wizard of wisdom…

[Discipline needs direction too.]

2009-11-13:

The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavour.

[It's a quote by Vince Lombardi. I think this is especially true. Whether you have found your direction or not, you need to have the hunger for excellence. With that, even without a direction, some people may eventually still achieve success if luck favors them.]

2009-11-13:

Where decision matters in split second is where learning is hard and slow.

[Leaning something new is always slow because of the need to build a solid foundation. Perhaps exponential growth is only possible with a long period of slow but thorough and accurate learning. Genius, of course, is an obvious exception.]

2009-11-13:

Don't let others control destiny and define luxury. Happiness can be very simple.

[Influential ads have directly or indirectly defined what happiness is by defining what level of quality products you need to consume. Though you did get happiness by doing so, it doesn't mean that this is the only way. Luxurious lifestyle is just one possible way of quality time.]

2009-11-13:

祸兮福之所倚，福兮祸之所伏，生活中有太多的晴天霹雳，需要坦荡荡的心灵去面对。多一份不必要的虚伪，等于多埋一个待引爆的炸弹。

[有时候虚伪是必要的，但无论作出什么虚伪都会有代价。不必要的虚伪，就注定了长远利益的双输。]

2009-11-05:

Final day before the final adventure, nothing will be certain but what I could rely on are my discipline and meticulousness.

[I learnt this word meticulousness from my colleague, and when I went back home to check its meaning, I have found a word that best describes one of my strength when I do things that I want to do. This doesn't come without cost of slight procrastination, though the link is not necessary at all. This bad habit needs to be killed.]

2009-11-04:

If I can see and link, life is just as real as any movie, drama, soap, circus, arena, novel, story, history, saying, fable, games, comics and so on - as all of them roots from reality. They are just as real.

[Imagination and sheer curiosity could link puzzles that are scattered and form a bigger picture.]

2009-11-03:

Life is a mystery. When you start asking questions, you get different answers; when you stop asking questions, you get no answer. Either way, there is no one simple answer. Is it a merry-go-round?

[About question of life, I think everyone had asked or will ask. We may never get a simple answer, but is getting a simple answer really the answer? Isn't life borne out of diversity and complexity? We may never get a simple answer, but if we fed up and stop asking questions, are we still passenger inside or passerby outside of our life train?]

2009-11-01:

We compare ourselves against both lesser and greater so that we feel proud but yet not complacent.

[There is an old saying of Chinese idiom: "Comparing against better ones and thus we are inferior; comparing against worse ones and thus we are superior" that conveys the importance of passive contentment. But somehow I think there is a greater meaning for using different targets for comparison: to strike a balance between pride and complacency. By comparing ourselves against the better ones, we develop fear and are stimulated to improve ourselves; by comparing ourselves against the worse ones, we shield ourselves from being overrun by fear and build up self confidence. The same mentality can be applied to comparing different scenarios to strike a balance between overly optimistic and overly pessimistic.]

2009-10-31:

The one that has no fear to rise to the occasion can do much better given a chance to "create" occasion.

2009-10-31:

知音易尋，淡志難明，花開花凋落，無人賞。

[世有伯乐，然后有千里马。千里马常有，而伯乐不常有。]

2009-10-29:

剑散刀乱，意逝琴挥，弹笑千里间，各奔往。

[所有的味道，都是由时间酝酿出来的。]

2009-10-23:

Disobedience is what keeps my fire; madness is what makes me normal.

[Being totally conformed is being totally deformed. Perhaps we all keep a certain degree of disobedience and madness under mask and let it revealed only when the time is right.]

2009-10-22:

风暴将息，坠翔的日子开始倒数，但等待着的，却是更变幻莫测的风向。克服对无定的恐惧，不过是第一关；而最终迎来的，也未必是阳光……但，这就是抉择。

2009-10-21:

Swinging between struggling and rotting, so rarely are we in perfect balance.

[That just illustrates how tough it is when time is running out and how ineffective are we when time is abundant.]

2009-10-18:

And hence one road diverges into two, and perhaps more...in the journey of decentralization.

[I think I am going towards the direction of decentralization and becoming generalist.]

2009-10-16:

Is it a norm that minority group has always been marginalised? The majority may not be tyrannical, but being negligent is enough to form this norm.

[It is sad. But perhaps it is unrealistic for people in majority group to step out of their comfort zone and be less ignorant. If you don't help yourself, no one else can help you.]

2009-10-11:

Tough call made. Tough sail ahead. Tough game everywhere.

2009-10-08:

决定追寻更广阔的天空，飞翔坠空够惊险，此去无路我来开。今曰事今曰完，明日事谁人知？

2009-10-07:

You can have the best of each path but you could only choose one to walk.

[Road diverges, time doesn't.]

2009-10-04:

If life is only worth few fantasies, why are we creating so much trouble for ourselves...

[Only if fantasies are free lunches.]

2009-10-02:

In the end, some fakers have noblest souls as they need different masks to deal with dynamic difficulties; while some moralists have excellence exteriors as they can't contradicts themselves with complicated realities. No one can really tell and perhaps that's why life is so fun. It's gaming world.

[World of masks.]

2009-10-01:

If intelligence, like coin, have two sides...then one side is vision, another side is caution.

[Vision is the front windshield, caution is the rearview mirror.]

2009-10-01:

与时间比赛奔跑时，想要喘气，和时间一同滞留时，渴望飞翔。。。我们总是倾向于不知足，但这样的不知足，是那么地自然，也并非什么错，而是对生活平衡的憧憬。能化一切于安宁，是莫大的幸福。

[知足不是一种平衡，适时的知足和不知足才是平衡。]

2009-09-30:

总是在冒险的荒野才会发现意外的彩虹。。。

[回酬和风险。]

2009-09-29:

There isn't a need to plan if there will not be execution. Planning is meant to make things happen accordingly and smoothly. Unless we are able to act reflexively and yet correctly upon sudden turn of events, if not we need to plan. Anticipation and flexibility work best in pair...perhaps.

[We anticipate whatever we can to reduce risk, whatever we can't, we have to rely on flexibility.]

2009-09-28:

The road ahead would be the roughest and toughest but I shall not regret. Life is no turning back once a decision has been made. Even the worst anticipated outcome would be a blessing in disguise. It's either being courageous or coward...for life is also like investment, risks and returns are often correlated.

2009-09-25:

Life stage is quantized...need concentration and concentrated efforts to break through higher state, or else would always fall back to the same old state, regardless of endurance period spent.

2009-09-22:

Melody of the September: Change is good. What you expect to be difficult has always been magnified by inertia and fear while the experience and excitement are the real flowers that blossom.

2009-09-18:

Good intuition comes from astute observations, poor intuition comes from pure imaginations

[Even abstract arts comes from reality, it's just different transformation, interpretation or representation.]

2009-09-17:

即使是现实的生活，也是介于半梦半醒之间.

2009-09-14:

Sometimes filtering noise for few minutes requires much more energy than working for long hours. And guess who make those noises? Those who talk the walk.

[Noise making is a necessary survival skill for someone without authentic skills to impress.]

2009-09-10:

这世界就是这样，有些人什么都不管，做东西乱乱来，反而落得"两袖清风"：无事干；有些人想认真做点东西，反倒成了"多管闲事"的贱人。

[人的世界最复杂。]

2009-09-08:

太极，年轻人学不来。有些人学了无用武之地，都拿去办公室实践了。

[这不是办公室政治，这是办公室武术。]

2009-09-06:

生活是一段又一段的起跑、加速、超越、喘气、暂歇、望梅、冲刺和结束。

[跑慈善短跑过后对生活的联想。]

2009-09-04:

The path that you think less people has taken, may be a false notion when you really walk along it, but it doesn't really matter, as long as the path is new and unexplored to you, you will find discoveries that would be useful and meet surprises that become memorable.

[Life is not about others, but yourself; life is not about journeys, but discoveries.]

2009-08-10:

The quality of education really matters for long...the power of empowerment and enlightening is simply unmatched by any other forces, and yet most of time it is treated as a materialistic gateway, to success, to glory, to pride...which are all secondary to characteristics.

[Skills can be valued, enlightenment is priceless.]